W for Words

6:52:00 PM

French journalist and politician Emile de Girardin once said on the power of words: Well chosen words have stopped armies, changed defeat into victory, & saved empires.

A few years ago, we got together with a few couples and were sharing on the power of words. Almost all of us could remember the strong hurtful words that were spoken either by our teachers, our parents and some of them our close friends. What was more interesting was that most of us had done things in our lives to disprove some of the things that were spoken about us.


Isn't it true that we've often loved to be around those people who have always spoken words of affirmation and appreciation? We choose to be around those people simply because we feel more valued in their presence. It gives us security and boosts our morale to pursue the things that we've been into even more.

Words have the power to hurt or heal a person. We cannot underestimate the impact that our words have on an individual.  Words have the power to shape lives especially in children. Positive words make them secure whereas if they have been abused, they grow up becoming insecure. Words can make or break a person. As a result, they can make or break a relationship in the long run.

Appreciating people always appreciates them as individuals and therefore appreciates the relationship. Affirming people always affirms them as individuals and therefore affirms the relationship.

Psychologist William James has said, "In every person from the cradle to the grave, there is a deep craving to be appreciated."

Appreciation always brings out the best in people. And when that appreciation is coupled with acceptance, love and encouragement, the bond between the people grow and it creates a strong relationship.

Take Away Principle: Words have the power to make or break an individual. Positive words can make a person secure and therefore even securing the relationship.

Tips on speaking affirmation and appreciation:
1.      Take note of what everyone is doing.
Always observe and watch what everyone is doing. It helps us to find key moments where appreciation can be truly given.
2.      Appreciate sincerely.
When giving appreciation, never give it for the sake of giving, but mean every word that is said. Let it come from the heart.
3.      Appreciate specifically.
Don't appreciate generally. But specifically point out what was it that they did that made the difference.
4.      Appreciate privately.
Do take time to appreciate privately. Let them know personally what it meant for them to contribute to the event.
5.      Appreciate publically.

Appreciating privately encourages people but appreciating publicly affirms them. Both are necessary. Always take time to appreciate them in front of others.

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  1. Agree with you, Danny! Words truly have the power to hurt or heal. One of my earlier manager at work never had a nice word for anybody. It was the first time I had come across somebody who could break the morale of a person with just words!! It was no surprise that nobody stayed in her team for long!

  2. WOW Danny ! I was reminded of the best principle that Carnegie has spoken about in his book , the things about appreciation. Not just praise, but appreciation. There's greater depth in it, yes ? And the power of constructively worded criticism that sounds more like an inspiration than criticism, that brings the best out of someone !!

    You're compiling all this into an e-book , aren't you ? Please do, if you haven't thought of it yet :) We want it :)

  3. Danny such a practicable post and wise too. Each of us I'm sure has instances from our lives where we have inadvertently said something which has gone on to have far-reaching consequences good or bad. Aware speech and appreciation from the heart would make life so much nicer :)

  4. Another inspiring post, Danny. Words really have great power and effectiveness when used in the right way and at the right time and for the right listener/audience.


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