Motivators Part Two - The Greatest One

4:50:00 PM

Happy Valentine’s Day!

In my last post (Read Part One here), I had written about seven terminators that look like great motivators but can cause us to terminate our good will, our relationships and over time our lives.
To be honest, I had been motivated by all seven listed out during many phases in my life. Not a single day goes by without having to face at least one of them.

It seems almost impossible to having to do something without having one of the seven as a motive. If these seven terminators are lethal then the right question to ask would be:
What is the right motive to have?

First of all, let me start by writing about something I experienced exactly a week ago. On February 7, 2014 at 8:30 pm, I became father to a baby boy (Yes, I am smiling right now!)

We named him John Danny Simon. He weighed around 3kgs at the time of birth and is steadily increasing as I write! I’ve always believed there are things in life that happens miraculously which cannot be explained. And this definitely is one of them.

Of course, I will be writing a full scale testimony later, but what I realized during the past few days in and around my son being born was about my motives that kept us as a family going.
Whilst there are terminators that destroy our lives, there are positive motivators that build us and the people around us.

There are three positive motivators that I’ve identified that not only keep us going forward but it deepens our convictions, our relationships and enriches our lives over a period of time:
  • Faith: is your conviction and belief. There are things that we do today as a result of the faith we have. It could be in God or certain things we’ve chosen to believe in. It becomes a catalyst for us to keep going despite the odds.
  • Hope: is your joyful and confident expectation. There may be things present right now that you are looking forward to see change over a period of time. Hope is that which helps you to wait right through the change that happens.
  • Love: is your true affection. There are things you do out of love. 
    It doesn't matter what you've to put up with or go through. You’re willing because you’re filled with love.

I firmly believe that if there are motives other than those that don’t fall into one of these, over time, it can become a terminator.

While writing to the Corinthian church, Paul mentions about these three. Eugene H. Peterson captures it beautifully in The Message,

“We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.”

We are motivated to do things out of faith, out of hope and out of love. But Paul says that of these three, love is the greatest.
I never understood why love was the greatest till my son was born.

In light of my experience, I can say that whilst faith and hope are great positive motivators; after a period of time, you no longer can hold on to that same faith and hope. I don’t mean that in a negative sense. Let me explain.

We were childless for the past six years into our marriage. What kept us going was faith in God that He would do something; hope that we would see our child one day and our love for God and each other.
But my faith and hope have changed for the things that I am looking forward to. What hasn’t changed but rather deepened is my love for God and for my wife.

Faith and hope can motivate us to go forward till we see our desired goal. Love is what will motivate us to go on forever.

We had great faith and hope that God would do something and we would see a child. Today, after having the child, I can say that our faith and hope has changed. I have faith that God would help us be great parents and hope that our child grows to be a great person!

My experience during the delivery procedure is something I will never forget:
Anu was due on the 4th but because my son’s head was not in position, we couldn’t go forward with normal delivery. They admitted her on the 6th evening and began to try inducing pain. I had to wait outside the labor room the whole of the next day. Finally on the 7th evening, our doctor told us that it was best not to wait any longer and to do a C-section. We agreed.

I wanted to get into the O.T. and the doctor agreed (perks of having a Dr. affixed to your name). So I got
into an O.T. gown and watched as they gave her general anesthesia. Now, I have seen many patients being cut open, blood oozing out etc. but this was different.
It’s not easy to watch someone cut open the one that you love.

Silently praying that things would go well without any complications, I watched as they took our baby out within the first 5 to 10 minutes of surgery. The Pediatrician took the baby aside and began to clean. Standing there with mixed feelings, my eyes were fixed on her as they removed the placenta and began to suture.

It was only when they were ready to take the baby out of the O.T.; I realized that I had not seen if our baby was a boy or girl. It was a boy.

I decided to stay on inside till they were ready to move Anu out. The clock kept ticking as they continued to suture. Finally what seemed like forever, they were ready to move her out into the Post-Op. 

She began to slowly regain consciousness as they shifted her. I stood by her side and whispered in her ear, “It’s a boy.” She smiled at me with her eyes half closed. Later they brought our baby to show both of us. It was a memorable moment as we both looked at our son together. 

It was then it began to dawn on me that it was love that kept me going all this while.
Love is the greatest motivator.

For me from the time I got married till date,

Love is… 
    …to stick together even though it seemed like we would never have children.
·         …to rejoice happily when we got to know that she conceived.
·         …to be with her at every check up for the whole 9 months.
·         …to wait outside the labor room for twelve plus hours praying that both would be alright.
·         …to go into the O.T. and watch everything even though it was very painful emotionally. 

      Love is…smiling at your son knowing that he just peed and pooped all over you!

How do you overcome the terminators in your life?
Have Faith…Keep Hope…Give Love.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

How about you? How has one of these three played
out in your life?

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  1. Different doses of all three Danny. Congratulations on the birth of your baby. Indeed a happy moment. My best wishes.

  2. Love, faith, hope all the three things that make life worth it!

  3. I loved reading this account, Danny! There is nothing more miraculous than watching a little child being born. Yes, I have closely seen all of the three at play in my own life. Best wishes to your wife and you and lots of blessings for the little one.

  4. Thank you so much Rachna!
    We are looking forward to a great journey ourselves!

  5. Hope Faith Love makes everything possible, truly!! Congratulations to you and Anu and lots of blessings for the little baby! :)

  6. Yup, that's true Shilpa! Thank you so much!!

  7. Congratulations Danny. Here in Singapore husbands can be in the OT doc or not. My poor non doc husband saw me cut open. :) your wifes experience seems similar to my first pregnancy. Happy parenting :)

    1. Thanks jaish! wow that must have been something for your husband to watch through...I can imagine!
      congrats to you too.. wish you the same :-)

  8. Replies
    1. Hey nice to see you here richa!! thank you :-)

  9. Congratulations to you and Anu, Danny! Such a little miracle! Stay blessed. ♥

    1. Nice to see you here Corinne! Thank you so much :-)

  10. Congratulations on becoming a father! You have a nice blog here.
    I have never thought much about motives behind my actions. Will keep a watch hereafter. A very enlightening post.

    1. Hi Aarthy! Nice to see you here and thank you...
      Yes, we don't often think what drives us to do the things we do... but when we do find out and make changes, the results are amazing

  11. I guess same three things. Right now my faith is dwindling a bit but lets see. Watching the birth of your child is very very special. Congratulations yet again, God bless :)

    1. Hey Saru! Hang in there! NEver give up!
      Thanks again for the wishes! IT wont be long before you see a breakthrough!

  12. Same pinch there...... my son did his first pee right on me :-)
    Congratulations there.

  13. Touch wood, Doc. Loved the post and the narration. I can imagine how it is, watching your love bing cut open, and another love hatching out of it :) It actually increases the depth of love that you share with her. Congratulations on the new roles you've been blessed with, Love to Anu and the little bundle of joy. Stay blessed !

    1. Hey Sreeja! Thank you so much!
      Yeah still gives me the shivers when I think about it! But it was worth it all the while! Will convey!


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