L3: Understanding

Trusting People, Trusting God.

8:09:00 AM

People trust in many different things, sometimes without even thinking about it. We trust that the chair will hold us up when we sit down on it. We trust that water will come out of the faucet when we need a drink of water. We trust that the sun will rise in the morning and the list goes on and on.

Many of you even trust your lives to things that have the possibility to fail. For example, how many of you have ever driven over a bridge, flown in an airplane or been operated on by a doctor? Some of you may even risk your lives and trust in certain material things just to have fun! Pull out the rope and continue, many people go mountain climbing, trusting their lives, in ropes like this. Other people jump out of perfectly good airplanes and trust their lives to a parachute. I think you get the idea.

It’s easy to talk about trusting things, but I guess the most difficult part is to talk about trusting people. How many of us here find it difficult to trust other people?

There’s this quote I saw recently that said:

Two reasons why we won’t trust people:

· We don’t know them

· We know them

I don’t agree with both of them.

The first one: you go to a doctor, you trust the doctor, you trust the prescription even though you might be seeing the doctor for the first time. Then you take the prescription to a pharmacy, you don’t know the people who are giving you the medicines but you trust them that they are giving you the right medicines anyway!

The second one: That’s pride and judgment right there. You think you know them enough not to give them a chance or you’ve given them a chance but they’ve messed it up. Now this is a little tricky and if you are not careful, you can end up losing great relationships over time. Why? Because people change and just because they’ve messed up once or even more than once doesn’t mean that they can’t do it right ever.

But here’s the problem with both the statements: both the statements are focused on the other person. When we say we find it difficult to trust someone, we tend to think that it’s because of that person. In other words, what we are really doing is that we are ‘passing the buck’ rather the responsibility. We are saying that my reason to trust you is based on your actions.

At the core, when you think about it, trusting others becomes difficult not because of them, it’s because of us. We don't trust people not because they have a problem, it's because we have one.

We can choose not to trust people but the truth is that life is a maze rather a journey that requires us to trust people whether we like it or not. We can get lost in the maze and not have a breakthrough if we refuse to trust people. If we decide not to trust them then the good news is that they can't hurt us but the bad news is that they can't help us!

Basic trust does not mean the ability to believe or trust one another. It is the capacity to hold your heart open to others. Basic trust is having an open heart. It is when you risk being vulnerable, even when it hurts you to stay open and not close your spirit. Basic trust is when you are able to move beyond the weaknesses in others, receive God’s healing touch one moment at a time, and not run away.

So how do you keep an open heart that is vulnerable to getting hurt? It’s only possible when we put our trust in God and don’t depend on our own understanding about what’s happening! Because now it’s not about them anymore, it’s not even about us, it’s about Him. Trusting in God helps us to overlook weaknesses in others and trust them.

When John had to get a haircut, he wouldn’t allow at first because he was always so scared. So he would always want me to get him on my lap. He would sit on my lap and allowed the barber to cut the hair. Now, I get it:he doesn’t know the barber and so why does he have to trust him right? But now he’s not looking at the barber, he’s not looking at the scissors or the machine; he’s looking at me, his father.

See, here’s what’s so important to understand: we need other people in our lives and the only way we can move out rather forward in our lives is when we are willing to trust them. It’s not easy to trust them, true...but it’s easier to trust a God who will never let us down.When our eyes are on Him, we surrender everything to Him and as a result when we trust Him, it becomes easier to trust in other people.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, Acknowledge Him in all your ways and He will direct your paths. That’s a promise! That He will direct our paths so we don’t have to try and trust someone again, we remain confident because He is with us and no matter what happens we know that He has things under control.When I put my trust in God, then it's no longer about the other person, it's no longer about me, it's about Him. So now I can put my trust in people.

Trusting in God is letting go of our control and surrendering to Him. When we are no longer in control and let Him take over then it becomes easier to trust people.

'An excerpt of the talk given at Plug In on 03/06/18'

A-Z Challenge

U for Understanding

4:00:00 PM

John Steinbeck once said, “Try to understand men. If you understand each other you will be kind to each other. Knowing a man well never leads to hate and almost always leads to love.”

How do you feel when you are misunderstood? Few things are more difficult to live with than being misunderstood. Sometimes it’s downright unbearable. We carry feelings of loneliness, frustration, disappointment and eventually resentment. How many times have we made the statement, “Only if he/she really understood me.”?

U-Understanding

Father Damien was a priest who became famous for his willingness to serve lepers. He moved to Kalawao, a village on the island of Molokai in Hawaii that had been quarantined to serve as a leper colony. For sixteen years he lived in their midst. He learned to speak their language. He bandaged their wounds, embraced the bodies no one else would touch, preached to hearts that would otherwise have been left alone. He organized schools, bands, and choirs. He built homes so that the lepers could have shelter. He built two thousand coffins by hand so that when they died, they could be buried with dignity. Slowly, it was said, Kalawao became a place to live rather than a place to die, for Father Damien offered hope.

Father Damien was not careful about keeping his distance. He did nothing to separate himself from his people. He dipped his fingers in the pot bowl along with the patients. He shared his pipe. He did not always wash his hands after bandaging open sores. He got close. For this, the people loved him.

Then one day he stood up and began his sermon with two words: “We lepers.....”

The key for a strong connection in any relationship is in understanding the other person. Understanding him/her helps us to know them better. We actually form a bridge into their world getting to know what’s on their heart and mind.

In his book, “Becoming a Person of Influence”, Dr. John Maxwell says, “To understand the mind of a person, look at what he has achieved and to understand the heart of a person, look at what he dreams of becoming.”

Understanding someone is like opening a door and finding something new. The thing about people is that when you open one door and discover something you will soon find that there is another door to open. Understanding people is a lifelong process.

Take Away Principle:

Taking time to understand people helps us to form a bridge into their world enabling us to from a stronger connection in our relationship.

Tips on understanding:

1. To understand someone, focus on their needs.

2. Remember that each person is different.

3. Take time to understand their backgrounds.

4. Learn about their past.

5. Assess their personality.

L3

Trusting People, Trusting God.

U for Understanding

U-Understanding

Take Away Principle:

Tips on understanding:

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