In this entire
series, we’ve been looking at various values that one ought to possess in order
to build strong lasting relationships with people. Now, we must remember that just
by practicing these values may not help in building strong relationships with
everyone. But it will help us understand and connect with others better and as
a result understand ourselves.
What’s important
is not how other people relate to us, what’s important is how we relate to
others. We can’t control other people’s actions and reactions but we can
control ours. We can’t determine how they feel about us but we can determine
how we feel about them. The most important person in any relationship is you.
Y-YOU
This is why it
is very important to accept yourself for who you are. We cannot build strong
relationships with others if we don’t have a strong relationship with
ourselves. Every one of us has insecurities and issues that we wish we could change
about ourselves. Sometimes we allow these insecurities/ issues to get the
better of us and we feel insignificant and worthless in the eyes of others. Often
times it undermines our ability to reach our highest potential.
Like any Marine,
Scott Winkler travelled to Iraq knowing that danger was part of the equation.
However, he never suspected to find it lurking in the back of a supply truck.
While unloading a fifty-pound box, Scott’s leg became caught in a strap, and he
collapsed to the sand, landing on his back with his torso grotesquely contorted
and his knees facing the earth. Surgery could not repair the damage, leaving
the young man paralyzed. Initially experiencing bouts of depression, Scott
finally reached a place where he said, “Enough is enough.” Unwilling to stay on
life’s sidelines, he began training for the Paralympics. Within two years, he
held the world record in the adaptive shot put and took part in the Beijing Paralympic
Games.
There was
nothing Scott could do to change his condition. However he refused to let a tragic
accident define him. He believed that he could still achieve despite his
disability and that made him a success.
What is
important is coming to terms with who we are. When we do that, we are able to
focus on our strengths and develop them enabling us to become secure in
ourselves.
Take
Away Principle: We cannot build strong relationships with others
until we’ve built a strong relationship with ourselves.
Tips
on building yourself:
1. Understand
that you are unique.
2. Increase
your value by trying to fix those things which are within your power to change.
3. Do
not allow circumstances or situations to define you.
4. Come
to terms with your weaknesses.
5. Work
on your strengths and develop them.
