F for Forgiveness

6:42:00 PM


We all know people who have done something wrong at some point in their lives. They did something they shouldn’t have. It would have easily gone by but unfortunately we happened to be the victims to what they did.

What they did; caused us pain, hurt and offended us. It left us feeling cheated and betrayed. It caused us to be bitter. It caused us to resent and hate them. It’s even caused us to lose trust in other people.

Unforgiveness is one of the biggest hindrances to any relationship. People are not able to move forward because they still hold on to things that happened in the past. They just can’t seem to let go of what’s happened.

F-Forgiveness


Former heavyweight champion GeorgeForeman puts it this way, “Millions of people have never figured it out. They’ve locked up people in the jailhouse of their mind and won’t let them out. And the prisoners are rioting inside! That’s why some people have no peace of mind. They prefer to live in constant torment, rather than set their prisoners free. That’s the way I used to be until I forgave all the people who offended me.”

Because of what’s happened in the past, people begin to build walls around themselves. They find it difficult to trust others and as a result fail to build strong, meaningful relationships.

Forgiving others becomes difficult because:
1. We have to deal with the hurt.
2. We often handle it ourselves.
3. We want to have our way immediately.

Forgiveness helps us to release not only them but   also ourselves. We free ourselves and it enables us to start trusting people again.

Take Away Principle: 

Forgiveness is what reignites and restores relationships. It sets us free and enables us to trust other people.

Tips on Forgiveness:

1. Understand that people are not perfect and they do make mistakes. 
2. Holding on to what has happened will only worsen the wounds. Choose to let go.
3. Talk about what has happened with those you’re close to. Opening up   to others can help in the healing process. 
4. Choose to forgive and forget what happened.
5. Begin anew.

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38 comments

  1. Very powerful! Indeed, forgiveness is good for everyone involved. And it feels so good!

    Thanks for the visit over at Life In Dogs , and I hope you had a great weekend.

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    1. That's true Guilie! It really feels good! Yup...it was amazing n thank you!

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  2. Without forgiveness no human being can survive and as I have written before this goes for ourselves too. Forgiving each other and yourself is important to move on with life..

    Richa

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    1. Absolutely Richa! Yup, loved that post where you mentioned about forgiving oneself! Forgiveness is an amazing relationship builder!

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  3. Agree with you completely, Danny! We must forgive others and ourselves for our own inner peace. Living with the hurt and resentment can be very detrimental for our mental and physical well being too!

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    1. THanks Shilpa! Yes, I didn't mention the physical aspect here...it does affects one's health to a large scale!

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  4. My best friend says I'm a very gracious person, but sometimes I wonder. Some people make it easy to forgive them. Then there are a couple who seem to can't help but throw a jab every time I see them. It's so volatile being around them, yet due to the situation, avoidance isn't possible. I'm not sure how to respond and usually stay silent, since the knee-jerk reaction is to either get defensive or toss a barb back at them. Yet I know if I try and say something, it'll come off sounding self-righteous or hypocritical. Not sure what to do there, so mostly I only see the person when I must.

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    1. Hi Loni!
      What you said is true too...some people make it easier for us to forgive them while some others seem impossible!
      What's important I believe is to approach them once and sincerely ask/seek forgiveness for what we/they had done...how they take it is upto them...It makes a huge difference getting the load off us...If they don't want to respond positively then that's upto them...it shouldn't bother us again.

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  5. My father was a minister and instilled in us the necessity to forgive. He died long before he would have seen the abuse I went through for many years. However, because of him and what I learned as a child, I knew that forgiveness was a choice and that choice was mine alone. One of the main reasons it was so difficult to write my memoir was having to dredge up that old pain and 'talk' about it.. On the other hand, it made me realize even deeper that I did not hold any unforgiveness against my attackers and abusers. So it was good therapy and I could close those chapters. Your post was well written, clear and concise.

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    1. Wow Carol! First of all thank you for being so open with us about this. I know quite a few people myself who have been through abuse and have been living in bitterness. And you said it well when you had to dredge up that old pain to talk about it but glad you realized that through that process you have forgiven them. And like you said it's always so important to close those chapters. Thank you Carol for such a warm comment!

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  6. Forgiveness is necessary to complete happiness in life. You may never forget and may choose to never go down that road again with that person but you can move on and get on with your life. Great post full of wonderful points! ♥

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    1. Yes, Kathy! And it's alright never to go down that road again as long as you've forgiven them. Thank you so much for the compliment!

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  7. We think of forgiveness as something we give other people, forgiveness is more important for the forgiver than the receiver. Also, we underestimate the power of forgiving ourselves.

    The 2 AM Writer

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    1. Well said Maggie! Forgiveness is more important for the forgiver than the receiver. We never realize that!

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  8. Fantabulous, Danny. Being able to forgive is a gift, something which I'm learning a lot these days. I love the way you craft each of your posts :)

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    1. Thank you so much Sreeja! IT is absolutely an amazing gift!

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  9. Your theme has become one of my favorite ones, Danny. Thoughtful posts on subjects close to our hearths.. Today no exception ... I believe forgiveness is essential yes, But always important in case of betrayal or mistakes, that the person betrayed will think if this is something that can be forgiven or if the mistake is too big to forgive... IF they decide to forgive it is essential to manage to forgive 100% and put it all behind in order to move on.. Looking forward to the next ones:-)

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    1. Thank you so much Eli! Forgiving is not always easy...when we feel betrayed we feel that we are on the right side and we have rights to hold on to. But in order to move on like you said, forgiveness is the key!

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  10. This is such an amazing " F " word but most of the time we people tend to Forget that . Thanks for reminding us of our emotions and responsibilities at the same time . Love your posts :)

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    1. Thank you so much Sushree! And yes, the world would be so much a better place if we could all forgive!

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  11. Another outstanding post. Forgiveness isn't always easy, but it is important.

    Carrie~Anne at That Dizzy Chick

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    1. Carrie! Thank you! It never is easy but always essential!

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  12. Another outstanding post. Forgiveness isn't always easy, but it is important.

    Carrie~Anne at That Dizzy Chick

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  13. Forgiveness is more difficult than it seems to be. But we need to keep working on it !
    Nice post !

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    1. That's right Ananya! We need to keep working on it...thank you!

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  14. Forgive, Forget, Move on!! - Mantra for our mental peace!! A thoughtful post!


    ~S(t)ri
    Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
    Smile, it makes (y)our day!

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    1. That's right Stri! And we need to keep moving on!

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  15. Yes forgiveness is a great healer of the self. I learned this the hard way. :-) Great post Danny :-)

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    1. Hey doc!
      Yeah some of the best lessons in life are learnt the hard way! Thank you for coming over!

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  16. points 2, 3 and 5... thats the best I can do... :D

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    1. Radha! It's truly not easy... but point one and four is what truly makes the process complete :-)

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  17. New follower here, just stopping by from the A to Z challenge. I love the miracle that come through forgiveness. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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    1. Hi Jessica! Thanks so much for stopping by! And you're right... it's truly a miracle that comes by when we learn to forgive!

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  18. May I share my favourite quote on forgiveness:
    “The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.” - Thomas Szasz

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    1. Lovely quote...they do not forget how to deal well in the future!

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  19. Nah,it is very esay to forgive.
    Its very difficult to forget.

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    1. That's true BK...it's not very easy to forget!

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