Angry Birds

8:50:00 PM


A few months ago, I had replaced my lap top with a galaxy note. My wife's brother and  family had come to see us and I showed him the phone. He has two boys. The elder one who is around 7 or 8, asked me, 'Does it have angry birds?'

Snake was a game everyone used to play on your older Nokia phones and today it’s Angry Birds! This is something who owns an Android device, I phone or a smartphone would be familiar with. The game is so popular that it’s there on Facebook and almost all other phone devices too now!


The theme of the game is very simple, you have a bunch of birds that are angry because their kin has been kidnapped and they are out to set them free.

But should we really be like the birds in the game? Quick to react and hurt ourselves?



I did a bit of reading up on the creation of this game. It seems that the guy who created it was in his room and had nothing else to do! The whole irony of this game is that it was created by someone who wasn't even angry!

We could get angry at certain things that are not working but that's OK. Recently I got angry at our railway website, I had to book the ticket thrice and all 3 times they deducted money from my account. I called  the centre at Delhi thrice and they refunded my money an equal number of times! We could get angry at things and react and that's OK as long as we don't do any physical damage!

But what happens when we get angry at people? What happens when we react because of our anger?
All of us have become angry at some point or the other. And most of the time, we were angry at some one. We have gotten angry because of what those people have done or said. And more often than not, it's because what they have said or done is not in alignment with what we have said or thought. Think about it, we get angry when people don't listen to what we have to say, we get angry when people don't do what we expect them to do.

Too many times when we get angry, how do we respond? We speak out or do certain things, which we immediately regret! How many times have we regretted what we said or did in anger?

My whole purpose of this blog is to see how to respond when we see something being done or said that can get us angry. If you've seen the movie Avengers, we definitely wouldn’t want to respond like the Hulk. Check it out! 


We know a lot of people who do respond that way! And then what happens? We create a dent in our relationships. We often leave the person hurt, in certain cases offended. As a result their relationship with us drifts apart slowly.

So how do we respond? How do we respond in a way that is constructive so that it doesn’t create damage?
I got 2 words to do if you do get angry: 

DON'T REACT!

No matter how angry you get, don’t react and then feel sorry for what you said or did! Just keep mum and if it’s too much to take, go away from the situation for a while so that you can cool down. The game Angry Birds was designed when the person was not angry! 

Some of our best decisions are made when we are not angry!

Once we calm down, it helps us shift our perspective about the whole situation that caused us to get angry. After we have cooled down, try to: 

See the person for who they are over what they did to get us angry.

Most of the time we get angry at the people we know really well. It could be our spouses, our family members, our co-workers etc people whom we are closely associated with.

When we get angry, we forget who they are and we react very negatively. The only things that we can focus on are the faults and the mistakes that they have done. We get so worked up on what they did wrong that we are ready to explode! We need to learn to look at the person rather than focus on the faults and mistakes that they have committed.

I am a dentist and I have my own clinic. I have a lady who has been working with me for the past 5 years now. She can get absent minded and for some of the mistakes that she does, I have been trying to get her to do the right thing for over the past 5 years! I have told her over and over again but yet she kept making the same mistake.
Very recently, she committed the same mistake and I just lost it. I scolded her and told her to correct it. But then, I felt bad that I had reacted that way. So I began to talk to her and then she said she was feeling bad as she had had a major fight with her son that morning. Her mind was so fixed on that incident that she wasn't focusing here. All that was needed were a few words of encouragement and you should have seen her! Her spirit was so uplifted that she did an amazing job the rest of the day!

You see, when we learn to overlook the mistakes and look at the person, we wouldn't react instantaneously! It changes our perspective completely!
  
The next time someone does something to get you angry, DON’T REACT! Stop and ponder over for a while and learn to look at the person over what they did to provoke you. Who knows what they might be going through? Getting us angry and reacting would make us look like an angry bird after they try and free their kin!

What are your views on anger? Are there better ways to handle anger? Give me your reviews!











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15 comments

  1. Definitely!! There are many ways to cool down when angry - the best one being, walking away from the scene, and probably having a glass of water. That brings one down immediately.
    I liked the article because you have highlighted a pertinent issue of today. We see youngsters carrying anger on the edge of their sleeve, ready to blow up at the least of provocation. And I have also read that some video games are so violent that they inject anger into the players, such is their effect.
    Anger is bad. I am not saying I don't get angry, but if I do, I am quick to apologise too. :)
    Good write up!
    Cheers
    Punam

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  2. That's true! A lot of video games do portray too much of violence! Anger is definitely something everyone finds difficult to control and therefore leads to bad consequences!
    Thanks Punam! That was really encouraging!

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  3. I'm an ex angry birds addict but we can not have that approach in real life. Anything done in the spurt of anger has negative repercussions. We should always have a calm and logical mind.

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  4. Well said Saru! That's exactly what we ought to keep in mind when we do get angry!

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  5. true , i hav made all th wrong decisions in fit of anger wch i found v hard to control...bt now evry tym i feel ovr powered by anger instead of 10 i cont 100 to calm myself dwn nd it works , nyc post.

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  6. Thanks Alka! ITs true! We all have made so many wrong decisions when we have gotten angry!

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  7. I don't know anything about the angry birds game although I have been hearing a lot about it. I know I have been an angry person for many years and even now do lose my cool. But I have learnt that anger is often an expression of inner fear or helplessness or powerlessness or sadness. I once shot out at a very close friend. I realized that while I was getting angry over one issue, at the heart I was responding to a series of events where she had not been asking my opinion or not allowing me to make a decision. So I had shot out! Once I realized the core issue I was able to sit down and talk to her and we resolved out it beautifully. In fact our friendship became even more powerful! Thanks for a thought-provoking subject. And excuse me that I took this long to visit your site.

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  8. Welcome Bhavs!
    Yeah, you hit it right! Anger is also due to insecurity!
    I too have lashed out at times, some ended up badly n some great! But this whole article comes from experience.... not reacting has helped a lot!

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  9. Hi Danny

    A very nice post....There is a saying in Tamizh that the hurt caused by words is worse than a scar caused by fire. (Thirukkural). I had written a post sometime back on getting angry. http://www.jaishwrites.blogspot.sg/2012/02/feeling-angry-write-it-out.html
    Do check out when you get time.

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  10. Hi Jaish! Yes, that's very true! They leave scars that sometimes go unhealed for years to come!

    Excellent post there at the link! Thanks for sharing it here! I think that's a great practical way to keep our anger from exploding out!

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  11. Oh Man...Angry Birds..This game has gone viral...Kids (and some Grownups too) are just crazy about the game...The birds are cute and the game pretty simple..Doesnt involve any strategy...Simply speaking...Its actually a game which would sooth ur nerves..Not one of those Max Payne stuffs where u wud probably die of a heart attack :)

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  12. Danny, you haven't posted in a long time. I come here and see my old addiction resting on top...:)

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  13. Yeah, Will be posting shortly! I must agree the game can get addictive!

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